Wish Granted

Tuesday night, 5/27/2008, was the Nightwish concert at the Granada Theatre in Lawrence Kansas. Jeep and I left in the afternoon and met my friend Jee and her cousin T in Lawrence, then we all went to the show together. As I type this Wednesday afternoon, my ears are still ringing a little bit.

One of the things I love about Progressive Rock is that it attracts such a wide variety of people. At a Prog show you will see young hard-partying metal-head drunks standing next to clean cut middle-aged businessmen. The majority of the people at this show seemed to fall into the twenty-something emo-goth-metal categories, but there were plenty of normal looking folks too, including a couple that must have been at least 50 standing behind us. (I asked that lady to take our picture because I figured she was least likely to rob us.)

As we were standing in line I had to smile when I saw a middle-aged man walking alone up the sidewalk. He was mostly bald with his remaining hair a bit long and disheveled, his scrawny pasty white legs were obviously not familiar with sunlight, and he was fumbling to put batteries in his camera as he awkwardly made his way toward the end of the line. But all nerdiness aside, he was going to a metal concert wearing a black Epica t-shirt. I started to chuckle at the sight until I realized I was looking at an image of myself in 15 years.

I had a few goals for the night. 1) Find a good spot to stand - the venue was standing only, general admission. 2) Rock out like crazy. 3) Make out with the lead singer Anette Olzon. 4) Touch Marco's beard; the bass player Marco Hietala has a long beard that looks very soft. Touching Marco's beard is on my life's 'bucket list'. I wonder what kind of shampoo he uses. Probably some exotic stuff only available in Finland. 5) Have an awesome time.

One memorable moment that was funny at the time, but gets more sad every time I think of it: As we continued to wait outside a man walked up who had clearly led a hard life of substance abuse that has apparently caused a good deal of permanent damage. He stopped next to me, gawked at the line of people stretching down the block, and asked what the line was for. After a silent pause, it seemed nobody wanted to respond to him. Never too afraid to talk to crazies, I told him we were there to see a concert. He asked what band and I said Nightwish. As expected, he had never heard of them. He asked what type of music, and a person behind me replied "Metal." The man then asked if they were any good, so I grinned at him and simply said "Excellent." The man then started to rant, "I came all the way here from Massachusetts, and it took me THREE MONTHS! (At this point he started yelling in the typical crazy burn-out fashion.) AND IF I'M HERE TO DISCOVER THAT THIS IS A GREAT BAND, THEN THAT MUST BE WHY I'M HERE! …" Halfway through his rant the line moved forward and he was no longer near us, so I don't know what happened after that. (Talking to burn-outs is always interesting. Remind me to tell you about the time I almost bought a used bike from an older crack-head couple.)

Random Comments:
- "I hear, but how will I see?" (Nightwish: The Siren) Once inside we found a good spot to stand about 35 feet from the stage, right in front of the soundboard, center stage. After suffering through the crappy opening act we had a great vantage point from which to enjoy Nightwish.

- The performance was great. The sound quality could have been a little better - the guitarist and Marco's microphone were drowning a bit, but I'm super analytical about stuff like that.

- The place was packed shoulder to shoulder and it was pretty hot, so it was difficult to do much fist pumping, headbanging, or any other sort of physical movement.

- Anette is a doll. You can hardly take your eyes off of her when she's on the stage, no matter how badly you want to see what the rest of the band is doing. She's beautiful, her singing is amazing, her dancing is great (not forced or cheesy), and her voice when she speaks is simply enchanting. It's as if you are a young child and she is this sweet, loving, Swedish au pare who is there to take care of you, tell you a fairy tale, and tuck you in to bed. At one point she did some headbanging and I've never seen somebody make headbanging look so … cute. She brings Elegance into the world of Metal; the perfect personification of this type of band.

- Marco = Metal \m/

- Emppu is tiny. Wikipedia says he's 5'-5". Marco's microphone stand was above Emppu's head when he walked past it. He would squat down in a typical metal guitarist pose and his head would disappear below the heads of the people in the first row. From our vantage point, it seemed as if he vanished from the stage until he stood up again.

- I only met 3 of my 5 goals. Jeep and I had to get back to Omaha, so we didn't have time to wait by the tour buses for the band to come out. So I missed my chance to touch Marco's beard and Anette missed her chance to make out with me.

My friend Jee, her cousin T, Jeep, Kevineb

Drums: Jukka Nevalainen; Singer: Anette Olzon; Bass: Marco Hietala
This is kinda a cool time elapsed shot. My shutter stayed open for a long time because it was so dark - which makes things fuzzy if anything moves, especially my hands - but everything was still enough for this to be relatively clear. You can see Anette's hand is moving downward, Marco's left hand is sliding down the neck, and his right hand is moving up and down.

Keyboard/Mastermind: Tuomas Holopainen (far left); Bass: Marco Hietala (singing in this picture); Drums: Jukka Nevalainen; Singer: Anette Olzon (her back to the audience, waving her fantastic fanny. Thank you Anette!); Guitar: Emppu Vuorinen

I managed to hold the camera still and get everything in the frame even though I'm holding it over my head, not looking through it at all.

You can't tell what any of them look like in my photos, so here they are:
Marco, Tuomas, Anette, Emppu (apparently standing on a box), Jukka

Setlist for the show (not necessarily in the correct order):
Bye Bye Beautiful
Dark Chest of Wonders
The Siren
Amaranth
Sahara
The Poet and the Pendulum
Come Cover Me
Whoever Brings the Night
The Islander
Nemo
7 Days to the Wolves
(encore)
Wishmaster
Sleeping Sun
Wish I Had An Angel

Grandma is a Metal-Head

While we're on the subject, here's another concert story from last year.
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Brief Prog History lesson:

In 1996 members of the progressive metal band Savatage formed a side project called Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Under the direction of composer/producer Paul O'Neill, TSO was essentially Savatage's alter-ego using various singers and more frequent ballads. Their biggest hit was "Christmas Eve/Sarajevo 12/24" which was first released on the Savatage album Dead Winter Dead in 1995, but was subsequently copied and pasted into TSO's debut album Christmas Eve and Other Stories in 1996. TSO found a niche market playing symphonic metal versions of traditional Christmas carols. To date they have created 3 Christmas-themed albums and only one non-Christmas album (Beethoven's Last Night: 2000) Their next album Night Castle is officially expected to be released in 2008 - unofficially, don't hold your breath.
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I went to a Trans-Siberian Orchestra concert for the first time last night (12/9/2007). I could spend quite some time telling you all about the show - the band, the orchestra, the sound quality, the lighting, the lasers, the pyro, the presentation, etc - but it will suffice to say the show was great, but our seats were not. Apparently I'm cursed when it comes to getting good concert seats and unfortunately there was no "broken seat miracle" like at the Dream Theater concert, further proving that God is also a Dream Theater fan and He REALLY wanted me to have a good experience at that show. (For more details see "DT in KC" written August 2007) But the real story here is about the lady in front of me.

Growing up as a band geek I would rehearse with the jazz band in the morning, play classical music with the concert band during the day, and then go home and listen to Van Halen and Metallica while I did my homework. I never saw any reason why these seemingly separate worlds should not coexist. I would often imagine how it might sound if these elements were united in various combinations. So naturally I found my place in the world when I discovered the realm of progressive rock and symphonic metal, but it's still difficult to find bands that can pull it off well.

But TSO has found some mainstream success, so I prepared myself to see an arena full of soccer-moms and even a few older folks. I wasn't even all that surprised when I saw Brother & Sister Johnson as we came in. The Johnsons are a very nice couple - probably in their 50's - and I sit by them at church almost every week. But I still can't quite get over the old blue-haired lady that sat in front of me. She was probably at least 70 and she was seriously getting into it, especially the heavier sections. She would lean forward and wave her little wrinkled fist in the air saying "Yes…yes…yes!" She would try to clap her hands in the air, but she was always just a little too slow to be on the beat. It's just as well, if she clapped too hard she would probably fracture her frail wrists.

At times Granny would put her hands together in front of her - shaking with either excitement or Parkinson's Disease - as if she were either thanking God or begging for more. "Yes…yes…YES!" I was pretty sure before the evening was done that she would need to change into a fresh pair of Depends. I was almost expecting her to throw her hands up in the "horn fingers" gesture and then flash her goods to the lead guitarist a la Girls Gone Wild.

At one point the two guitarists engaged in a free-form improve solo exchange when one guitarist, much to the delight of the "younger" crowd (20 - 40), began to play the opening lines to "Voodoo Chile" by Jimi Hendrix. When he stopped and waited for the crowd to respond I yelled "More Jimi!", and Granny replied with all the vocal projection she could muster, "More Christmas!". So I cleverly responded, "MORE JIMI!!!" He didn't play any more Hendrix, but the other guitarist responded by playing a few lines of "Black Dog" by Led Zeppelin.

This little old lady apparently thought she was there to hear Christmas music, but it was very clear to me, and to all those around her, that she got most excited by the heavy metal elements of the songs (and I do mean … ahem … "excited."). And I don't blame her. After all, that's why I was there - to hear some well done symphonic metal.

So maybe this is the way to give progressive music the exposure it deserves: trick the public into thinking they're listening to something else: - It all starts with an exciting, modernized version of Carol of the Bells.

- Then maybe they can move on to rock versions of non-Christmas classical music (see Beethoven's Last Night and various songs by Savatage).
- Then make the transition from classical songs with modern elements to modern songs with classical elements (Nightwish, Savatage, Symphony X…)
- By then they will realize the orchestra is great, but not always required (Dream Theater, Porcupine Tree, Pain of Salvation…) and before you know it we will have an entire nation of well-rounded prog-heads. (See also "If Prog Were Mainstream")
So keep on rockin', Granny! As irritating as you are, you bring hope to the future of progressive rock. Maybe I'll see you at the Progressive Nation tour this summer with Dream Theater and Opeth!


This isn't the lady in the story. I just like the picture.

Kevineb
"Hermit the Prog"


P.S. If you like the idea of heavy metal being played on top of a full orchestra, do yourself a favor. You MUST go out and get the album Dark Passion Play by Nightwish. In fact you should get it even if you don't like metal. If you like soft ballads, you should get this CD. If you like female vocalists, you should get this CD. If you like male vocalists … if you like traditional Celtic music … if you like sea shanties … I don't care what you normally listen to, you will find something you like on this album. I have never endorsed a CD so fully before - and this is coming from a die hard Dream Theater fan - but this CD will permanently change the way you listen to music.

DT in KC

This is one I wrote last year.
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On Monday night (8/6/2007) I stood in the presence of Deity and basked in its awesome power, wisdom, and glory. “Did you have some kind of near-death experience?” you ask. No…I went to a Dream Theater concert!

I’ll admit, this is my first real concert; not counting local bands playing in the back room of a bowling alley that is now being plowed over to build a Wal-Mart. But what an amazing night! The Uptown Theater in Kansas City is beautiful. The old-fashion decorations, arches, moldings, and statues transport you to another era (apparently an era before air conditioning was invented. More on that later.)


The evening didn’t start so great. The first opening act, Into Eternity, absolutely sucked. They were just loud and screamy. Ridiculously, painfully loud. So loud that everything turned to mush in my ears except for the singer’s embarrassingly comical squealing. They actually sounded better with ear plugs half-way in to dull the noise. They sounded better yet with the ear plugs in completely.

The second act, Redemption, was much better. I might seek out one of there CDs. Into Eternity and Redemption both played for about 35 minutes each.

Our seats were terrible (Jeep, Princess Flip-Flop, and myself). We were about 23 rows back, on the aisle of the middle section, directly behind the soundboard. All I could see was the backsides of the sound techs, and instead of seeing what was on stage, I was distracted by the lights on their equipment and monitor screens. But then a miracle happened! This shows that modern-day miracles do occur, and proves my theory that God is a Dream Theater fan. When Into Eternity finished we stood up to stretch (and/or throw poo at the stage) and Jeep and Princess Flip Flop’s chairs both broke! The ancient seats just fell apart!

So we had to ask the young female event staffer for different seats. And she was cute. Really cute! Dare I say “angelic”, sent from on high to work mighty wonders. She directed us to the row in front of the soundboard, about 5 rows up from where we were, in the more expensive seating section; about the 18th row. I shuffled over to my new spot and sat down, grateful to now have an unobstructed view. I looked up to the stage, and behold, I was dead-center! PRAISE THE HEAVENS FOR BROKEN SEATS!!

Dream Theater hit the stage and the whole place jumped to their feet, which is where they would stay for the next two hours. They started by playing a bit of Strouss’ “Also Sprach Zaratustra” (think “2001: A Space Odyssey”; bumm … bummmm … Bummmmm … BA-DUMMMM!!”) then launched directly into Constant Motion.

Dream Theater was amazing! The sound was great without being absurdly loud (no ear plugs during Dream Theater of course)! The lighting did a great job of enhancing the music without distracting from it. The videos on the screen were good. I liked the cartoon that went with The Dark Eternal Night, in the same fashion as the one for Octavarium (sorry, I’m off in DT World now. I realize none of you know what I mean.)

For the first two DT songs I sat about seven feet from the drummer’s wife and kids until they appeared up in the VIP mini-balcony in the upper-right of the picture above.

It was HOT! And I don’t mean “hot” in the Paris Hilton “that’s hot” kind of way. I mean that place felt like a giant sauna. The singer for Redemption was sweating buckets and commenting on the heat. Princess Flip-Flop got dizzy and had to sit down for a while after DT had been on stage for about an hour and a half. Major kudos to DT for playing under the hot lights for two hours.

When it was over I was hot and stinky, my voice was nearly gone, and my shoulders were sore from pumping my fists in the air. I probably lost 3 pounds in two hours from sweating, bouncing up and down, and a little head banging (as much as can be done without any hair to move around and without causing my glasses to fly off. I am so metal!). Jeep and Flip-Flop headed for the car to start up the air conditioner and get some water, while I ran around front to get a picture of the marquee. As I ran against the stream of people a tired, sweaty concertgoer said, “Dude, how can you RUN after that?” I like to think that all of my cycling has acted as training for this night. If I weren’t already past him I might have said, “You mean after two hours of moderate aerobic activity in unbearable heat and humidity? That’s what I do for fun, Buddy!”

I managed to sneak my camera in and take a few pictures without being caught, unlike the guy in front of me who was taking pictures with his cell phone until security spoke to him; then I didn’t see him any more. Unfortunately all my pictures are blurry due to my poor photography skills and my inability to hold still while I’m rocking out.















I hope they come back this way on their next tour!

Kevineb